6.15.2017

Our Post-deliberation Charge

Today I completed my 1st experience serving as a juror. It was a criminal case. 1 defendant, 6 victims, 35 charges. It's been 8 gut-wrenching days and 7 restless nights. After we delivered the verdict, we were shaken and silent. Even though we were resolute in our decisions, there was no decision we could make that didn’t bring more pain to so many lives already affected by the chain of events that led us all to the courtroom.

On my way home I was wallowing in the aftermath, letting my mind wander through the entire process...it was then I remembered the number 12. And how 12 of us did something amazing and these days is pretty rare.

This is what we did.

As soon as deliberations began, we decided to take an anonymous straw poll on the main charges: before we even talk about it, do we think the defendant was guilty or not guilty?

The vote was split 6/6 on almost every charge and my chest fell. I was thinking things like "hung jury" and "I'll never see the sun again."

But then the amazingness happened.

12 strangers talked and listened. Points were argued passionately, received openly, and responded to honestly and respectfully. No one raised their voice. Everyone was heard. When someone was struggling to address the really difficult and sensitive parts of the case it was met with with empathy. No one's words were considered less important or less meaningful than anyone else's in the room.

We considered all the evidence (facts) and shared them through the lens of our beliefs (opinions) with the belief that everyone else's are valid. (Speaking of evidence, there wasn't a lot to go on for most of the charges.) Back and forth, up and down, inside and out we kept working together towards our goal of unanimity.

It took us more than 16 hours to get there. Those 16 hours contained some of my proudest moments of being a US Citizen and a resident of Philadelphia, the birthplace of the country that gave us this incredibly powerful way to engage with and support your fellow community members.

I wish more conversations in our country were conducted the same way the 12 of us did these past few days. It was tough but it was rewarding. It took a long time but it was worth it. 12 open minds gave freely and received fully.

That is all.

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