Kick MS in the teeth. Get some shit.

Hello my gorgeous, sexy, brilliant, and GENEROUS friends! How are you? Are you feeling pretty good right now because you do not have Multiple Sclerosis (MS)? If so, I hope you will continue reading on behalf of the 400,000+ people in the US who would have answered "no."

MS is a raging whorebag that needs to be stopped. It is often times a debilitating disease that comes out of fucking nowhere to kick the shit out of your central nervous system. And once the fucker shows up, it never goes away. It's not genetic, it's not caused by having a great lifestyle (ie, drinking or smoking or McDonald's eating your brains out), and it's not caused by any co-morbidities (eg, other shite diseases). The humper just shows up--totally uninvited--and basically vomits all over your brain and spinal cord so your limbs go numb or you lose your vision or you're paralyzed. Oh and did I mention there is no cure? DAMN YOU MS!!!

I fucking hate MS so much I am going to wear a spandex diaper and bicycle 150 miles over 2 days to help run over this hot pile of shit of a disease. I will be attempting this for the 3rd year in a row September 25 & 26 in the National MS Society's "City to Shore" ride.

But I need your help in bitch-slapping MS in one of 2 ways:

1. Join my fucking super cool team and ride with us! Click on this blue line for details, then search for "Chain Gang"

2. Sponsor my ridiculously long yet extremely rewarding ride in September through a donation to the National MS Society so they can continue their research and advocacy efforts.

As an added incentive to helping out really sick people, I am offering the following prizes for different levels of donation:

Up to $20: personalized e-mail sent directly to you expressing my gratitude for your awesomeness

$25 - $45: personalized e-mail PLUS a dedicated Facebook status update that expresses my gratitude for your awesomeness and is guaranteed to increase your sexual appeal and popularity*

$50: personalized e-mail PLUS Facebook status update PLUS a personalized blog about your awesomeness**

over $75: personalized e-mail PLUS Facebook status update PLUS a personalized blog about your awesomeness PLUS a mix CD

If you can help out in any way, it is really, Really, REALLY appreciated. Click Here to link to my donation page.

so thank you, Thank You, THANK YOU for your time and support!!!!
xo

*Facebook status update can be substituted for an e-mail blast if you are not on Facebook. MySpace not accepted.

**Note the blog will follow the already established "all a little bit true sometimes but not really" format.