Tonight I raise my ice soaked Jack Daniels to you, Dougie. I am still holding my end of the line in disbelief, but I know you are in a better place. You were always so funny. Smart. Genuine. Wickedly huge-hearted. And I loved that you were the type of person that wouldn't even flinch if I screamed "KEVIN COSTNER IS A CUNTFACE!" at the top of my lungs at a playground on a sunny afternoon in July.
I remember the first and only time we met. First words out of your mouth: "That's how Janis died? What a sickly way to go." And without skipping a beat I replied, "but kinda sweet too you know." I always knew I wanted to know you forever, quoting Bruce McCulloch and trading Beck and Yes bootlegs.
You loved music. No, you RESPECTED music. I was always in awe of your reverence, and I always will be. I still want to be as cool as you if I ever fucking grow up. The night I learned that you died I wrapped myself with Mike Keneally and Steve Hackett...they held me up but offered no comfort...
When we first clicked into place in this crazy, beautiful, dirty asshole tragedy of a universe one of my favorite sparks was our Seconds Out "Carpet Crawlers" moment. Our simple, silly, inside joke that we seriously acknowledged that this version of the song is superior to any other version, especially any version vocalled by Gabriel. And for the past 12 years and until I join you and Janis I will think of you whenever I am blessed to listen to it. And I smile.
Goodbye, Doug.
I wish we had more time...
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